ZOMBIES (oh and me having some wangst)

December 2nd? Really, Cat, that was your last post?

 

I am a slacker.

To be fair, I blame the constant partying. (This is a joke). It’s summer here in Cape Town so there’s much braaiing and drinking going on. That’s the theory, heh.

 

December is a weird month for me. It’s the time I’ve reached total and utter burn-out but somehow I need to get in gear for the summer holidays and prep presents and food. Normally this is doable but now I have this book-thing looming over me. Somehow I need to do promo and organise launchy things and write blog posts that are semi-coherent and stuff. Halp.

 

And I’m terrified and panic-stricken. It’s beyond ridiculous. The book is done and I can’t change things now. All that’s left is for me to stand on the sidelines. But as much as I’d like to divorce myself from what happens now that the book is making its first forays into the wild, it’s hard.

 

Yes, I read the reviews. Yes, I get sad when people don’t get what I was trying to do and miss the point completely. On the flip-side, seeing people totally understand what the book is and falling in love with it – that’s awesome. That makes it worthwhile.

 

Whatever happens next, I can at least say that I got this far. Maybe it’s as far as I’m going to get, maybe I’ll go on to sell more books – who knows. But at least the years of writing really shitty books paid off as my work slowly began to improve and I learned stuff about novel writing. (Osmosis and critique and writers’ groups and books and books and more books. Oh and writing. LOTS of writing. In case you want to know the secret formulas.)

 

Now I get to learn stuff about disengaging from a published project and accepting that I have no control over how people react to it. All I can do is go and write and revise new work.

 

Oh, and I can order this book and get my Moskowitz fix, because it released YESTERDAY and I am dying to read it.

 

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cat_hellisen

I write.