peanut butter & jam on toast, or: How to make me like writing.

So if you know me, you may know of my utter loathing for peanut butter. Hand me a sandwich with peanut butter on, or worse, with added jam, I will make a face like this

Okay, got that? Now picture me starting an eating thing that requires me to NOT eat peanut butter or jam sandwiches. This is like the world’s easiest deprivation. I win!

 

Only I don’t.

 

Because now all I can bloody-well think about are peanut butter and jam sandwiches. How wholewheat bread is so nutty and delicious, and that particular rich creamy texture of peanut butter + the awesome crunchy bits. How gorgeously purple rich youngberry jam is. How much I want this damn sandwich that you normally couldn’t pay me to eat.

 

Life. Gah. Instead I had a spoon of pb & jam, so there, but still.

(I could totally write slash about the above picture, but I am trying to not be too creepy because I mean really. Also, I don’t need to. In F1 the slash writes itself)

 

So anyway, it’s a simple bit of psychology that parents understand only too well, and now I am going to apply it to myself. See, I have this book. I kinda like it, but not enough. Or rather, I used to like it but now I’m scared of writing it because it isn’t perfect, and it’s dumb, and everyone will laugh at me because it’s shite. (It’s also first draft and unfinished, so shite by default, but I have never let things like logic bother me).

Obviously with this attitude, I have a desire of -1 to work on it.

 

CAT YOU MAY NEVER WORK ON THIS BOOK AGAIN EVER SO THERE, AND IF YOU DO EVERYONE WILL HATE YOU AND SO ON ETCETERA.

 

hokay.

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cat_hellisen

I write.

4 thoughts on “peanut butter & jam on toast, or: How to make me like writing.”

  1. Cat, i am SO with you here – i feel exactly the same way! (well, about my un-finished book, not about peanut butter and jam. Personally i think peanut butter and jam rocks!) So in the spirit of sisterly-writerhood and stuff, CAT, YOU MAY NEVER WORK ON THIS BOOK AGAIN EVER, AND IF YOU DO EVERYONE WILL HATE YOU AND SO ON. (…p.s. let me know if this helped at all…)

  2. The urge to work on the forbidden rises in me…

    NO CAT NO WORKING ON THE NOVEL.

    AND NO PAMELA STOP WORKING YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO OR THE RAIN WILL COME BACK.

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